No matter how you feel about your loss of a loved one, you will never be the same again. You will never look at the world with the same eyes that you had previously. For some, grief is the great educator, and for others, grief is the great tormentor who seems to be waiting to rip out any form of happiness that you may have experienced. There is definitely a yin and yang to the grief journey. It is full of unbalanced emotions. However, grief can be your greatest teacher from the awareness of the seed of your anger.
Emotions are powerful, and none so much as anger. It is so powerful that it burns in you like acid, and in your pain – you turn on people, situations and even a higher power. Anger at the world for doing you a disservice and anger at others who are here when you perhaps feel they should not be. Anger at a higher power, because you cannot understand why your loved one was taken from you. As you take every new moment in your life, your anger will bubble away like molten lava until it is time to release, and then, oh boy! Watch out world because here comes fury, fire and all out destruction.
The Light Of Grief
In your grief, you will not see the surrounding light, and you will feel subjected to continual negative thoughts and feelings. The questions asked came from confusion and then hatred and so much more. Many people will take you wrongly, and it can often lead to relationships becoming more distant and even failing. It is at this point that your immediate environment and everything around you changes. You have created distance from everyone, everything and even yourself without you knowing.
Expectations In Grief
People have expectations of what grief and grieving should be like, and often one cannot comprehend the journey of grief unless they have experienced all those raw emotions that are the great teachers of the journey. Expectations, come from labels and labels cause negative attachments that play with the mind.
You must ask yourself, where is your anger coming from? What are you furious about? Until then, you put yourself in a kind of inner hell loop that you cannot get out of until you can be authentic with yourself in your grief. Whilst it is perfectly okay to be not okay and express emotions such as anger, you must be open to its teachings too. What can you learn if you cannot become aware of the great teacher within? How can you be expected to break through your grief if you cannot be honest with yourself in your grief journey.
Are you using grief as a crutch that will fill a void that is not about loss, but about guilt and shame. Is your grief masking hidden suffering and attachment to false emotions. Maybe the grief experience is teaching you to open up to self forgiveness. In that forgiveness, you begin to feel that which is temporarily blind to you – your loved ones on the other side of life.
You will often hold onto and cling to false perceptions in the hope that you can find some solace in that perception. The reason you cannot connect authentically with your loved ones is because you are being inauthentic with yourself and your journey through grief. If you can become aware of your journey and aware of the seeds of the emotions you experience, you can come to a place of surrender. By surrendering to the higher power, you become more authentic with yourself within and your divine power is ignited. You begin to remember who you really are and that you are a spirit in human form. You can unfold each emotion as it helps you to grow in your spirit and your faith. In reality, you will come to know and not believe.
Anger and Grief In Your Journey
Anger in your grief is only a way of releasing and expressing, but the power is in realizing where the seed of the anger is, because the power in this awareness will awaken you to the peace that is hidden within the kernel of that seed. In order for anything to change in life, no matter what it is, one must become aware. It is the most powerful tool in your arsenal. To be self-aware means that change is in motion, should you make the decision, and, change can happen at a faster pace.
This means, your spiritual growth and awareness is developing rapidly and, therefore, your ability to deal with your grief and, of course, develop a new relationship with your loved one based on spiritual connection is not only possible, it is inevitable.
Whilst there is truth in the fact that you will experience anger and that it will manifest in so many ways, it will change your life for the better. The awareness of the seed of your anger will become the catalyst for change and will be the catalyst for your deeper connection with your loved one. What you need to do is talk to your anger. It is far easier to talk to it and recognize it for what it is. Love it as part of your journey and do not hide from it in any way.
Anger can be a great awakening as long as you seek to understand it and become aware of its seed, for only then, can you accept grief as the journey that will bring you a deeper connection with your loved ones. Anger is your greatest teacher in loss.